When I saw the scale hit 130 yesterday, I knew it was time to get serious! I have been keeping a pretty detailed food diary for over a month now and have continued to see the calories add up but still give in to my extremely strong food cravings. I think there are environmental factors at the moment that are sabotaging my efforts but I also need to take some responsibility. I make excuses for not exercising (too tired, too hot outside, the gym is too far, and etcetera...) and yet eat like there is no tomorrow. I want to eat around 1000-1200 HEALTHY calories per day but right now I am averaging 1800-2500! One day last month (the day I decided it was time to start keeping a food diary) I had eaten 3300 calories... that is 200 calories shy of an entire pounds worth of food! I have been better since then but better is not cutting it, I need to get serious!
I wake up every day with the best of intentions to eat healthy and keep the calories down but find myself too weak to resist yummy foods. I can justify eating anything if I want it bad enough. I truly believe I have some sort of food addiction because it controls my life. It is a constant internal battle trying to justify why I should or should not eat something and the food usually wins. It's an awful cycle that I am ready to break.... wake up, resist indulging, give in and eat too much, feel disappointed the rest of the day, go to sleep and then wake up and do it all over again (all while watching the scale go up!) I have no will power and am trying to figure out what it is going to take to get back in control over food. I am hoping seeing 130 on the scale is enough but if I know myself and my love for food it is going to be much easier said than done.
Just to put it in perspective, I wore a size 0/1 up until 3 months pregnant and now I wear anywhere from a 5/7 to a 9/11 depending on the brand (and even then I have an awful muffin top!) It is uncomfortable to me to be this heavy and am tired of daydreaming about being in shape. I AM READY TO LOSE THIS WEIGHT!
My intentions for this blog are to keep myself accountable as I document my weight loss progress. I am going to put up comparison pictures along the way (as much as I am dreading that) so that we can visually see the progress. And I promise no more of my posts will be this long! Thank you for making it this far!
My intentions for this blog are to keep myself accountable as I document my weight loss progress. I am going to put up comparison pictures along the way (as much as I am dreading that) so that we can visually see the progress. And I promise no more of my posts will be this long! Thank you for making it this far!
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